Click here for my Husband's Testimony

Since I was little I have had my own idea of how the world was supposed to be, how my life was supposed to be. Somehow most things always fell short of the picture in my mind. I was told that to go to heaven I must be the perfect LDS woman, but I could never discover what she was. I was told that I must love God. But I could never figure out how to love someone that seemed only a vague idea and not a real person. I always felt a sense of failure because I could never reach that elusive perfection I was told was out there somewhere. I figured that that must be what the scriptures meant by "enduring to the end".

So I settled down into a pattern of quiet desperation, like all of my friends, hoping that somehow I would accidentally do "whatever it was that I was supposed to do" right so that I would win my exaltation.

I might still have been in this sad holding-pattern that LDS women live in, but I had one thing that my friends were not blessed with--a husband who was not satisfied with just going to church on Sunday to receive his ration of religion. He wanted more. He believed in a God who was real, who was aware of and involved in His children's lives. He studied the scriptures and the words of the prophets. He had the audacity to believe what they said and to live what he learned. He then taught me and we taught our children.

Life began to look more like I imagined that it should. But we needed people who were like minded. So God lead us to Manti. Our story is much like the other people in our church. We experienced many joys and sorrows on our journey here.

I thought that when I was excommunicated from the LDS church (a church I'd been in all my life ) that I would feel a deep sense of loss. But to my surprise, I felt a lifting of my spirits. I felt like a heavy burden was lifted from my back.

As I began to learn the fulness of the gospel, all the pieces of the puzzle fell into place. Finally the life that I had wished for began to be a reality. I began to really love God because I came to know Him. I learned for myself that He is real. I learned how to communicate with Him. I learned what perfection is and how to achieve it. I learned what perfection isn't, and the harm that we do to ourselves in trying to live up to a false perfection.

Since I have gathered here, I have discovered that there is a place on this earth where I can raise a family , with people that know the same God that I do. I know what it's like to be taught by a true prophet. My life now has a satisfaction that I had never known before.

Is it easy here? No. I've struggled alot as I've had to face my self. But now I know how to overcome my problems. There is no vague "endure to the end" notion here. I have discovered what God meant when He said that "man is that he might have joy".

I can now not only say that I know that God lives, but that I know God. I know that Jesus is the Christ. That Joseph Smith began the restoration of God's ancient gospel and that James Harmston is finishing this work. I know that this is the gathering place for God's people.

So this is my testimony. Simple and sweet, just like the gospel. To all those who desire to see life the way it really is, the way God meant it to be, I invite you to heed the words of Christ in the 11th Chapter of Matthew:

"Then spake Jesus, saying, Come unto me, all ye that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart; and ye shall find rest unto your souls; for my yoke is easy and my burden is light." (Matthew 11:29-30)

This I testify to you in the name of Jesus Christ.

Tamara (Sam) Maudsley